Personology

So, here's the first question of this blog post. Who is  your best friend in the world, dare I say, or in the universe?I know you have your answer, for some of you, you may not have the privilege to access me and tell me who that person may be. Therefore, I shall be sharing my answer to that question. Now, if you know me personally, and we're close enough for you to think that I'll mention your name. You are not far from the truth. If you refer to me as a best friend, I probably do the same. However, to remain politically correct, my best friend is my mother.

My justification is that she's known me far much longer than anyone else, and much more than ninety eight percent of people do. My apologies to anyone disappointed in not being mentioned as my answer. You can always challenge my statement if you feel the need. 

So hopefully by now we've established that we all have a very close friend in our lives. What's so special about best friends? I think one the reasons is that there's usually a deep and mutual understanding of each other. When you think back to before becoming friends, how much you were strangers and now you're peas in a pod. It's a fascinating process the way in which you get to learn about someone. It's not like an academic subject where there are textbooks and different published materials to go through, in order to get information. Rather, it's through bonding with the person, which comes with spending time together, having disagreements, growing together, mourning together and rejoicing together. I would like to coin it as personology, the study of a person through experience. I think that my mother would definitely have two PhDs in the personology of Blessing.

 Our friends know us so well, at times it's almost like telepathy. Without words, those close to us can understand what we are trying to say. At times I wish that I could call upon  a friend when I'm asked to talk about myself, because they know me better than I know myself. Friends know so much about us, at times maybe even a bit too much in terms of embarrassing stories. This makes the loss of a friend something difficult to live through. It reminds me of when I was five years old,each time I had to part with a friend after a play date I would usually be in tears. Even now, I still don't find easy, I don't cry as easily as I did when I was in preschool, but friendship breakups are tough. It may be because of death, or a change in geography, or any other unfortunate circumstances. Fortunately, we have the memories and all the good times spent, backed up in the storage compartment of our minds.

To be fair, I might have been wrong in asserting that my mother is my longest serving friend. There's one other person, I'd like to believe that has been around longer, that is myself. No one else spends more time with me than me, don't you think so too? I know what I like, I know how I feel, I understand my pain the most and I've always been there by myself first. I think know myself well, but I can never articulate who I am. I just find myself existing in only the ways that I can. The upside to it is that I have friends who know and love me. When they do tell me about what it is that I am to them and what they see in me, I never cease to feel cherished. I guess words of affirmation really are my love language. 

Lately, I've been trying to engage my readers, by getting them to do something each time I conclude. This time I'd like for you to take time to appreciate your friends. Pause and take time to reflect about your dear friends. What is it about them that made them your friend? What do you like about them? What makes them so unique in your sight or what do you both have in common? Maybe, if you can, tell them these things, and show them how much you value your relationship with them.