Pretty obvious

If there's one thing I'm self aware about, it's the fact that I'm not the world's greatest communicator. Growing up, my mother would always tell me people are not mind readers, nor are they prophets. In the event that I had to air out a grievance, no one could tell by looking at my face. I remember the hindrance to my ability to communicate, was the angst I would often feel. As a seven year old, I would have rather gnawed on a raw potato, than talk to a distant relative on the phone. Thankfully, I am mostly past such feelings now. 

A more apparent challenge I face with communicating, is assuming that an issue is apparent for all to see. What tends to happen is that I end up in  a misunderstanding, due to the fact that, I may have omitted sharing certain information. The reason being that, I assumed it was obvious and not really something to prioritize sharing, or it seems to be unnecessary information. Such mishaps have had me on the receiving end of quite an earful, more times than I would like to count. 

In my defense, this stems from a slightly irrational fear. The fear of coming across as being obvious. I don't know about you, but there is a slight peeve I get from someone pointing out the blatantly obvious. It makes me think about the European explorers, ''discovering'' animals and places that already existed, and already had native names. Perhaps what annoys me isn't the obvious fact being stated, rather it's the ignorance and pomp that can be carried across by those stating the facts. 

Another thing that ranks in the peeves, are questions that are so obvious, they almost sound like rhetorical questions. I highly doubt that those questions are stemming from curiosity. I do not know why they are asked. The vaguest thing that comes to mind is perhaps to serve as means to do small talk. These kinds of questions that force me to only say yes, make me feel as though I am in a verbal choke-hold.

 

The worst part of it all with all these peeves is that I too am a perpetrator. The fact that I can be so oblivious to other people's perception of what's in front of all of us. Then the face palm comes when I realize that everyone else could see what I was pointing out, much earlier on. Or, when I fancy someone and I ask them, the most horrendously obvious question in order to keep conversation going. I almost gag when I remember times where I have been blatant. 

In order to have better flowing communication, I have had to forsake my fears. As a matter of fact, a policy I have had to adopt, is the fact that there is no such thing as being too obvious, when communicating. So now when collaborating and coordinating with others, I have it at the back of my mind, to make sure that everything is out in the open, and there is little to no room for assumption. Perhaps in order to achieve clarity, I must become that which I dislike.